What I really need is a trained monkey to write my blog for me. He could follow me around all day taking notes, then blog everything in the evening. Perhaps I would revise it slightly, correcting the occasional grammatical error or suggesting a more eloquent phrasing. Afterward the monkey and I would kick back and crack open a couple beers or a banana liqueur while we laugh at the each other's various witty remarks. Yes, I definitely need a monkey.


You see, I've had no time to blog lately. All of my spare time has been dedicated to important projects like building a gas turbine engine or watching Nate rescue Zelda. Krishna has been hard at work tracking down the endless stream of parts needed. This involves buying about 8 incorrect parts for every piece that actually fits. Equipment can be hard to get as well, especially if you want a medium-size plasma cutter. It took over 25 phone calls and a couple failed trips to find the right place. Eventually we were referred to a company in Long Beach called Arcrent (affiliated with Praxair) who outfitted us with everything we need. My car is currently home to a plasma cutter, a mig welder, a compressor, a cylinder of argon and a sizeable collection of pots, pans and other parts. Oh, and there is a go-kart frame strapped to the roof.


It's a more complicated project than we first estimated. Leaf blowers, compression fittings, oil coolers, break lines, pressure gauges. Every day is full of lessons. Saturday's lesson was never rent equipment from Home Depot when Harbor Freight sells it for less than the rental cost. Sunday's lesson was there is no such thing as too many washers. Each day we are reminded of the rule: never trust anyone selling auto parts. We were finally able to use the plasma cutter Sunday evening. It's sort of like using a light saber, at very close range. It cuts through 1/2 inch metal like a knife through warm butter. Mmmmm.... glowing red steel. We still have a lot of work ahead. But, firing up a jet engine strapped to a go-kart will be worth the effort.


We also learned two things about gas pumps and credit cards. First, gas pumps have a $50 credit limit. This is not difficult to hit while refilling a '67 New Yorker at current gas prices. We also found out that if you try to use one credit card three times within a short span of time at the same gas station the pump locks up and flashes “SEE ATTENDANT NOW”. Presumably so the attendant can inform you that you are using a stolen card.


In other news Shane's work was mentioned on slashdot. I made a small amount of money playing poker on Thursday. A Canadian woman was fired for stopping to help a gunshot victim. And, the dollar is falling. I ran across a rather amusing headline related to this: Dollar Stays Soft Despite Snow's Support. The article begins by saying “The dollar stayed weak on Wednesday even as U.S. Treasury Secretary John Snow voiced support for a strong dollar.” What? This guy getting up to a podium and saying that he likes the idea of a stronger dollar is supposed to improve things? What does he normally say, “we'd like to see the dollar sink even more”? Apparently he repeated his efforts saying, “Let me reiterate my support for the strong dollar.” Is the dollar supposed to feel encouraged by his warm words? Did he clap and try to get the wave started? I can just imagine a team of cheerleaders beside him shouting “GOOOOOO DOLLAR!” Commenting on the strong dollar policy one insightful researcher deduced, “It looks convincing when the dollar is strong, and doesn't look convincing when the dollar is weak.” Thank God for the experts.


Well, it will probably be a while before my next post. Krishna and I will continue to be thoroughly occupied with our project. Hopefully we'll be off in the desert this weekend testing it out. I doubt I'll have time before then to update the blog. If I'm not at my desk working I'll be in the back yard or Blacker. If you get really bored just watch this.

Mardi Blah

Shane and I ventured up the 101 on Saturday in seach of action. Specifically we had heard that San Luis Obispo was host to the wildest Mardi Gras celebration this side of the Mississippi. What a dissappointment to arrive and find only long lines outside crappy, overcrowded bars. Where were the costumes? The people in the streets? The drunken, naked revelry? The locals insisted that the celebration had resembled it's reputation in the past, but this year the authorities had changed things. Appalled by the possibility of bead giving and breasts flashing, the upright leaders of SLO decided to put a stop to the offensive merriment. The mirth-inducing Saturday evening parade was moved to early afternoon on Sunday. And Saturday night was further held in check by a small army of cops roaming the town, keeping people off the streets, breaking up parties, and generally making folks uncomfortable. Inside bars people complained about the new restrictions, but no one put forth any creative solutions. So, people got drunk while packed into bars like sardines instead of out in the main street. We ended up at someone's house eating seven layer dip and tamales, but got kicked out after a dispute arose between Shane and some drunk guy. After one last stop at a bar and a lengthly search for our car we started on our way back home.

Earlier on Saturday I picked Krishna up from the airport and we retrieved his '67 New Yorker. We had to replace the battery but the car seems to run just like it did a year ago. Over the last couple days Krishna has gathered together all of the materiels he had shipped here and has aquired many new parts. Our living room now resembles a surplus store. Tomorrow we'll gather even more parts and hopefully on Wednesday we'll secure the use of a welder and plasma cutter. Well ventilated area ...

I'm sure you've all heard the now famous remarks by Canadian MP Carolyn Parrish: "Damn Americans, I hate those bastards." I wish politicians would insult each other more often. Wouldn't that make political debates much more interesting? "You son of a bitch, I'll show you environmental policy reform!" I think it's funny that people are calling Parrish brave and outspoken for something she said under her breath while she thought no one could hear. In fact, she tried, at first, to intimidate a reporter into not publishing the comment. Though, to her credit, she hasn't backed down on what she said. She apologized for saying it publicly, but stands by her opinion. This earned her a cheering crowd when she appeared on TV. And why not? Everyone should be allowed to freely speak their minds. Even those damn Canadians